This post is for all Muslims struggling with their marriages.
Is your marriag(es) with your wife(s) on the rocks?
Are finding not happiness when you are plowing your field, so to speak, is managing your female property more troubled that is worth?
I suggest that you are stray too far from Mohammed’s example and from sacred Islamic law, so to help you out, I present to you 5 steps to a happy Muslim marriage.
Step 1. Marry young
15???
No, younger.
12???
No, younger.
10???
No, younger.
9!!!
Yes!
Muslim sources repeatedly state that Mohammed had sexual intercourse with Aisha when she was 9 years old. She is constantly described as young, immature, and pre-pubescent, and we are told that she was playing with dolls when se was taken to Mohammed’s house.
But some of you Muslim men are hesitant, you know that there are different standards for you and Mohammed. You are read Al-Kortubi and see that Mohammed had certain sexual privileges that other Muslims men don’t have. For example, if Mohammed wanted another woman, it was obligatory for her husband to divorce her, also, Mohammed had a bunch of wives, unlike other Muslim men that are limited to only four at a time, however, if you are in doubt if whether the privilege of marring a young girl applied only to Mohammed, let me ask you a question.
Mohammed once asked one of his companions
Clearly only a true prophet of god would ask such a question, why not marry a young girl so you may play with her, unfortunately Mohammed didn’t tell how you supposed to play with your young wives. So, if you need ideas, I suggest starting with a dollhouse and see where it goes from there and of course on the opinion of numerous Muslim commentators across the centuries the waiting period in Sura 65:4 which is required for divorce if the marriage is consummated applies to pre-pubescent girls as well.
Ibn Katir says the waiting period for the old is the same as for the young who have not yet reach the age of menstruation and the ignoramus Maududi gleefully proclaims that the Quran allows both marriage and intercourse with prepubescent girls.
So, there you have its Muslim men, marring young girls is allowed by your prophet and your god, as if there’s even a relevant difference between the two. So, go do step one, marry a young one, this is sure to add an extra dynamic into your other failing marriages, who knows, maybe your other wives might even enjoy babysitting.
Step 2. Use your conjugal rights!
Remember in he depraved manual of sacred Islamic law we are told that the man has full sexual rights to the woman and she is not to refuse going along with what Mohammed said in the hadith, stipulations most entitled to be abided by are those with which you are given the right to enjoy the woman’s private parts. Further the Islamic law says men don’t have to support their wives if the women fail to hold up to their end of the sexual bargain, but since the man can have multiple wives, he can refuse sex with them accordingly, however, under no circumstances does a man refusal to have sex with his wives mean that the wives can refuse to have sex with the husband. If a woman refuses to have sex, that constitutes rebellion in Islamic law and we have a solution for that problem:
Step 3. Beat them!
Now this is not a detail tutorial on how to beat your wife, this is an issue far to complicated for me, so I’m going to leave that to the Muslim scholars, just like there is a technique to swing a baseball bat or golf club, I’m certain there’s a technique here involved as well, surely you’re not supposed to just step on the proverbial plate and swinging that wife-beating steak haphazardly, how do you hold the stick and how fast do you swing it, or maybe is more of a barehanded beating or maybe use boxing gloves, who knows, but thank fully there are some very helpful YouTube videos with authorities from the religion of wife-beating to help answer these questions, but for our purposes, when we think of physical discipline, perhaps the first think that comes to mind is spanking a child, this works special well , since according to Islamic law, your wife may actually be a child, However, does physical discipline still apply in the unfortunate event
But those wives from you fear arrogance, advise them, if they persist, forsake them in bed, and finally strike them. But when do you know exactly you can beat her? Any time she’s been rebellious, which includes all kinds of things, like leaving the house without permission, or refusing sex with the husband. Notice how Islamic law very diligently looks out for the sexual interest of men. Just like Allah, in Muslim paradise, where he’s prepared large-breasted virgins, but you don’t want to wait until paradise, you want it now! You’ve tried to apply Step 2, use your conjugal rights, your wife for the night has refused, so you beat her, Step 3.
Remember, Allah permitted you to have sex with your wives and your female slaves, so just to review. Step 2 requires Muslim men to have their conjugal rights, if your wife doesn’t comply, beat and threaten her and, remember, to always to keep sex slaves on the side in case of an emergency.
Step 4: The Two C’s: Cut and Covered!
Mohammed endorsed the circumcision of girls.
He was ass vague as the hadith as Allah is in the Quran, thus we find in Islamic law disagreements about whether is required or recommended and how much of a girl’s private parts should be cut out and as is well known in the translation in Reliance of the Traveler (4:3) intentionally misleading. Section e4:3, states circumcision is obligatory for women by removing the clitoris. Handbalis and Hanafis disagree.
The health benefits of this procedure for girls and women, can be described as follows. The procedures can cause severe bleeding, problems urinating, cysts, infections, infertility, complications in childbirth and increased risk of new born deaths.
I guess Mohammed with all his scientific knowledge just couldn’t figure this one out. It is a violation of human right of girls and women.
Of course, whether or not his is a violation of women’s rights in Islam, can be debated, since you can violate something you never have in the first place.
The second C, keep those things covered, like Umar told you to.
